Friday, January 21, 2011

Insert ominous music here...

I must be crazy.  Here I am in my very last term of school (ideally for the rest of my life, but I have a sneaking suspicion I will find myself in grad school in the future) and I've heard of senioritis, the laziness that sets in when graduation comes clearly into view, but I am finding I definitely do not suffer from that dismissive affliction.  Instead, I have discovered my last term of school is probably going to lead to a heart attack (or perhaps just a panic attack.)  For some unknown reason, I am more stressed about my performance this term than I have been in quite some time.  I think it's the fear of knowing a failed class at this stage of the game sets me back an entire term!  There is no way I am going to allow that to happen!

Because I take my courses online, I have to log on every evening to view my readings, video lectures, discussion boards, assignments and returned work.  As I watch the page load each night I get a knot in my stomach, anticipating a missed deadline or a poor score on an exam.  When I finally close down my browser for the night, I often realize I had been holding my breath.

Thankfully, tonight when I logged on to my courses I was greeted by two full-credit discussion grades, one full-credit paper grade and a returned quiz with a score of 117% (I know lol)  Talk about a relief!  If only I could hold onto that feeling for a day or two....but I know that gnawing anxiety will be back in full force later tonight as I work on my discussion responses... 8 more weeks!

2 comments:

BonnieRose said...

I feel the same way with online classes... I don't know what it is but I am always feeling rushed and anxious to sign on and see what I missed or did wrong... :) 117% is always a great feeling!

Mama-Bug said...

I feel like it's easier to ignore your progress (or lack of progress) in a traditional class because, even though you are receiving graded assignments along the way, you don't have access to the grade book and your weighted grade! I can see my grade book in every one of my classes, so I can see how each assignment impacts my total grade lol It makes me crazy!

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